Marrying after 6 months dating
With the divorce rate over 50 percent, too many are apparently making a serious mistake in deciding who to spend the rest of their life with. The golden rule is, if you can't be happy with the person the way he or she is now, don't get married. You pick the wrong person because the man doesn't understand what a woman needs most.To avoid becoming a "statistic," try to internalize these 10 insights. You pick the wrong person because you expect him/her to change after you're married. As a colleague of mine so wisely put it, "You actually can expect people to change after they're married... " So when it comes to the other person's spirituality, character, personal hygiene, communication skills, and personal habits, make sure you can live with these as they are now. You pick the wrong person because you focus more on chemistry than on character. Men and women have unique emotional needs, and more often than not, it is the man who just doesn't "get it." Jewish tradition places the onus on the man to understand the emotional needs of a woman and to satisfy them.
After marriage, the two of you will either grow together or grow apart.To avoid growing apart, you must figure out what you're "living for," while you're single -- and then find someone who has come to the same conclusion as you.Chemistry ignites the fire, but good character keeps it burning. "I'm in love" often means, "I'm in lust." Attraction is there, but have you carefully checked out this person's character? Ask yourself: Do I want to be more like this person? The unique need of a woman is to be loved -- to feel that she is the most important person in her husband's life.Here are four character traits to definitely check for: Humility: Does this person believe that "doing the right thing" is more important than personal comfort? The husband needs to give her consistent, quality attention.
When the man forgets about his own needs and focuses on giving his wife pleasure, amazing things happen. You choose the wrong person because you do not share a common life goals and priorities.
There are three basic ways we connect with another person: Make sure you share the deeper level of connection that sharing life goals provide.