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and I'm not talking about sugar-free carbonated soft drinks.We live in a fluff-free era—people know what they want and aren't afraid to express their opinion in ALL CAPS, followed by a series of passive-aggressive emojis. In hopes of answering your burning questions, here are 13 dating apps ranked (lovingly and subjectively) on how likely you are to end up takin' old one-eye to the optometrist.The sole review on the app's page summarizes it nicely: "You buy points to promote yourself, and to view/ message other ppl, and to see who liked you. down the drain." The transition from desktop to mobile for websites is a bit like the great change from silent films to talkies during the late 1920s. Unfortunately, POF seems to be succumbing to the same fate.
Mixxxer takes the carefree sentiment of casual swiping and infuses it with the high-octane close-up shots of vulvas that you see on sites like Live Jasmin.
It's a no-nonsense approach to dating apps with its "I'm here to f*ck" mentality," but when you see that most of the users may/may not (but definitely are) legit prostitutes, the fun is lost. Let's face it, after Tinder took off, the appeal of Ok Cupid started to wane—much like the flaccid penises who were getting ignored by the instant gratification swipe of Tinder.
Dating is the same—we've reached critical mass, and that critical mass is critical on getting their mass touched. Anyway, with the act of dating living solely on a mobile platform, the dating app reigns supreme. Hey, gotta quench that thirst somehow—what's that famous Mother Teresa quote?
Oh yes: "Get it girl, get it get it get it, girl." A dating app that allows people to meet based on their intellectual capacities rather than their looks! But, you know what happens when two smart people meet?
You can talk to a person, but can't see what they look like.
Even if you have a great conversation with a person, you're not going to want to bone them if they look like Rex from close to getting it right—the one thing they didn't anticipate: charging money kills erections faster than, I dunno, bees?