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'Do you think God is punishing me for having sex with a man 20 years younger than me?' This was the question I asked a close friend when I was about to file for bankruptcy back in 2011.When I first left Mexico and came to America 20 years ago, I never imagined trying to create a good life for my family would be almost impossible—and punishable by law. My name is Guadalupe and I am a wife, mother, and mobile food vendor.I’ve worked jobs ranging from housekeeper to attendant at a dry cleaners.But commuting for hours every day at jobs I didn’t love prevented me from seeing the very people I was doing it for: my family. I began selling tamales door-to-door six days a week, sometimes going to bed around 2AM and waking up at 4AM to continue preparing for the upcoming day.One fascinating aspect of my work as a couples/ family therapist is that it gives me an intimate view into the current cultural dynamics of couples.
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Yom Kippur, the Jewish holiday of repentance, had barely been over for 14 hours and I was already fighting with my husband. Over our poached kale and egg salads with a side of chickpeas I notice my firecracker friend is uncharacteristically glum.
Has my Teflon-coated mind not retained a single shred of serenity? When Peter died, the only thing that kept me sane was writing about grief. I recognized that by spewing out my emotions with honesty, I was helping others which meant it was work that made me satisfied.
My husband and I have been together for over 20 years. We met in high school and watched each other graduate high school, college, and graduate school, find (and change) careers, and become parents.
We watched each other become adults and now we are watching each other age. I meet my friend Geraldine at a hip, local eatery in the heart of Abbot Kinney in Venice Beach.